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After getting passed over for a promotion in favor of the boss’s niece, Chris returns home to discover that his girlfriend has broken up with him and stolen all his furniture. All Chris has left is four empty ice cube trays, a twenty-three page letter (front and back), and an annoying friend Jay. Separately, they are nothing. Together, they aren't much more. Nonetheless, they shall embark on an adventure to discover the Greatest Beer of All Time. They shall mostly fail. It will be completely obvious to everyone. And yet, they shall be worshiped by the beersicle sucking townsfolk, conquer the Evil Doppelganger, befriend the vegetarian Crunchy Bitch, and survive an hour in prison. The bar bill will be huge. The line for the bathroom, more huge. But in the end, at least there will still be incriminating photos.